Not long ago my wife got me a present for our anniversary – a bottle of Unicorn Tear Gin Liqueur. You might not be familiar with it, but for a while this liqueur had been getting a lot of notice on social media just based off of its novelty. It was getting write-ups everywhere you looked on the internet. Plenty of liquor websites reviewed it. Liquor.com wrote a piece about it and constantly shared and reshared their write-up on their social media channels. It even got mainstream press with write-ups in the Huffington Post and other news outlets. It was hard not to get excited about it. Most importantly it was beautiful. It was a fantasy beverage come to life! How could someone not need this? Plus they had been unable to secure distribution in the United States, so it made the the gift that much more amazing. This was collectors item liquor.
Unicorn Tear Gin Liqueur – The Fantasy
“Amazing” doesn’t really describe how this looks does it? Nothing short of “magical” really does it justice. Just look at this bottle! It’s sparkling with hues of pink, purple and gold. Inside the liquor silver flakes float around like, similar to bottles of Goldschlagger, making it even shinier. You can practically hear music being played in the background. It’s so pretty it almost makes you wonder how it could have anything to do with a unicorn crying. As a child of the 80’s I’m completely susceptible to good marketing and there is little question that this is as good as it gets. It’s a great looking label, a funny concept, and it has gorgeous imagery. This is gold, or at the very least silver. Drinking this would be like tasting the very essence of Narnia and Middle Earth combined!!
Unicorn Tear Gin Liqueur – The Reality
Sadly, though not at all unexpectedly, Unicorn Tear Gin Liqueur doesn’t live up to the hype. Without the correct lighting it’s not nearly as dazzling as portrayed. If anything it’s just kind of cloudy. The silver flakes don’t dance around and sparkle like they did in the marketing pictures. Even sadder, it tastes awful. Imagine a syrupy sweet middle-of-the-road bottle of gin and you will have a pretty good idea of what it tastes like. I’ve tried three recommended recipes, and none of them were good. I won’t say it’s the worst thing I’ve ever had, but since I’ve had apple-jalapeno wine that doesn’t say much. I suppose it’s still neat to display since it’s kind of a novelty, but maybe not even for much longer. In fact, that’s why I’m writing about it now.
Just a few weeks ago, the makers of Unicorn Tear Gin Liqueur announced that it it is finally getting distribution in the United States, along with Mermaid Tears Vodka and Phoenix Tears Spiced Rum. As you can see the new bottles are much more toned down. The magic is gone and in it’s place is a somewhat crude cartoon of a unicorn crying. It’s much more appropriate for what’s inside the bottle. Anyway my advice is to pass on this. It was a wonderful gift, and I’ll treasure my bottle of it, but without some special sentiment to go along with it you can’t help but be a little disappointed, unless what you want is something along the lines of drink with a 50/50 mix of gin and simple syrup.